«Дар освобождения», курс 10 «Новогодний ретрит», занятие 3

[Geshe Michael Roach] (0:00 - 0:06)
Okay, any questions? Because if you don't have questions, you have to have more books.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (0:06 - 0:13)
If you don't have questions, you have to have more books. Yes, please. Um, I don't know what you want me to do.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (0:46 - 1:34)
That's a good question. There's an exercise in meditation where you blow things up and then you shrink them for fun. Just for fun.

You make big, and then you make small. And it's good for your meditation. It's your meditation muscle.

It builds your muscle. So sometimes you can make the lion as big as the sun. Sometimes you can make that lion, you can fit ten of them under your fingernail.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (1:37 - 1:41)
And that's a very good exercise.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (1:42 - 2:26)
So I would suggest that. Sometimes you can see yourself, there's a Mount Everest that's sitting next to you, and you just chop off the top with your hand, you know. That's an old Jimi Hendrix song.

Just chop off the top of Mount Everest, you know. But, you can, in meditation, it's good for your meditation. Or sometimes you think the whole world is under your fingernail.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (2:32 - 2:32)
Yeah.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (2:32 - 2:49)
Okay, so it's good to, it's called Delmar Goma [?] in Abhidharma. It's the Abhidharma system. Okay, another question.

Rosa? Oh boy.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (2:50 - 2:59)
If you help me, okay? I don't remember very well.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (3:05 - 7:31)
So, mahamudra means meditation where you watch your own mind, and you think about emptiness. Then there are, Buddha taught six big kinds of emptiness. When I started to study Buddhism, I heard explanations about emptiness from several people, and it just confused me.

I remember I was in, I studied in India, right? There were some big teachers there, you know. And they said, they were talking about, a monk can use emptiness to not look at girls.

Then I said, how is that? They said, when a monk looks at a girl, he should think she's just two ears, one nose, two eyes, one mouth. Just take apart all the pieces, you know.

Then you won't have desire. So, I look at her. Then nothing happened.

It just seemed strange to me. Then it confused me. I was very confused.

I think if someone teaches you emptiness correctly, it should be something you can use in your life. So then for many years I studied different schools' ideas about emptiness. And there's a very nice summary of six kinds of emptiness.

So, I will do them quickly, but it's a long subject. And maybe you have to help me. So, the first one is called BDAG GCIG RANG BANG CHEN GYI BDAG GIS MTHOR [?].

BDAG GCIG RANG BANG CHEN GYI BDAG GIS MTHOR means, the first part of that is, everything is empty of being unchanging. If you do the opposite way, it means everything is changing. But in Buddhism we always say negative way.

There's nothing permanent about this paper, for example. Unfortunately, this computer is not permanent. I will have to buy a new one.

I know. Something will break. So, how do you use that to make your life more happy?

It's not you're supposed to go around and say, my girlfriend is impermanent, and my computer is impermanent, and my hand is also impermanent, and then you're unhappy. You're supposed to use it about your problems. Then whatever problem you have now, yesterday we had in the text, DNGOS PO SO NA MI BSTAN PA, it means nothing stays the same.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (7:33 - 7:37)
You have some big problem this week.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (7:38 - 8:28)
Huge problem. Next week it will be smaller, okay? It always changes.

Two years from now you won't remember the biggest problem you have today. There's some Christmas song about that. Anyway, it says this year's problems, next year we won't remember.

So, that's the first kind of emptiness. Nothing lasts forever. Everything changes.

All of your problems are going to be nothing in one year.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (8:28 - 8:32)
You won't remember them.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (8:34 - 8:43)
So, don't get too upset or don't get too worried about them, okay? Even if you do nothing, they will go away in a year, you know?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (8:43 - 8:44)
It's okay.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (8:47 - 9:09)
Life goes on. Okay, that's the number one emptiness. Second is RANG BANG CHEN GYI BDAG GI MTHONG BA means there is no controller in the present time.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (9:11 - 9:18)
You can't change what's happening in the present time.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (9:18 - 9:21)
It was planted last week or last year.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (9:26 - 9:32)
You meet someone you don't like at this retreat even.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (9:32 - 9:39)
Then no use to get upset. Someone is saying something you don't like.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (9:39 - 9:40)
At dinner or something.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (9:42 - 10:00)
And it's too late to do anything about it, okay? They were planted last week. So, relax.

You can't control. You cannot control them. Please don't talk like that.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (10:02 - 10:21)
It doesn't work, because they are coming from your karma, and you don't have control of it. You can control what happens next week, but you cannot control what's happening today, okay?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (10:21 - 10:33)
Do you control your arm? Yes. Why?

I can raise my arm. If I tell my arm, Geshe Michael say to Geshe Michael's arm, you raise yourself.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (10:38 - 10:47)
So, I control my arm. But then someday I will not be able to lift my arm.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (10:47 - 10:52)
Gravity will win the battle.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (10:52 - 10:54)
I say, get up, get up.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (10:56 - 12:02)
Even your arm, you don't have control. Much less irritating people at lunch. So, relax a little bit.

Okay? Just have some good lunch. That's number two.

Emptiness number two. Third one. Where is that?

suk tan sung dzin gyi tse ma tse shing gi tongwa. suk tan sung dzin gyi tse ma tse shing gi tongwa. Okay, suk tan sung dzin gyi tse ma tse shing gi tongwa [?].

Okay, I'm sitting at lunch, and some person is irritating me. Who put me there? I did.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (12:04 - 12:08)
I've made the karma last week.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (12:08 - 12:19)
Who put them there? I did. I put me at the table, and I put them at the table.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (12:22 - 12:54)
In fact, in Buddhism, we say, if you look at any tree, look at any tree here, when you go to lunch, and you meet an irritating person, that person and you are growing from the same seed.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (12:55 - 13:00)
You are like two branches of the same tree.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (13:00 - 13:15)
You planted one seed, and that grew into two things. You and the irritating person. So whose fault is it?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (13:17 - 13:20)
It's your fault. So relax.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (13:22 - 13:44)
You put yourself here, and you put them here also. So just relax. They are empty of coming from a separate seed than you.

And that's a third kind of emptiness.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (13:45 - 13:46)
So I'll say three kinds of emptiness again.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (13:49 - 13:50)
First one.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (13:51 - 14:01)
I am empty of anything which will last. And my problems are empty of anything which will last.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (14:05 - 14:06)
Number two.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (14:07 - 14:10)
All situations are empty of self-control.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (14:11 - 14:39)
I cannot control them in the present. I can change what happens next year, or next week. But in the present, chill.

Chill out. Chill out. It's too late.

Just relax. It's going to happen. Third one.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (14:40 - 14:46)
The problems in my life are empty of coming from a separate seed than me.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (14:46 - 15:00)
The problems in my life are empty of coming from a separate seed than me. Each one is empty. Fourth one.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (15:07 - 15:48)
RANG BZHIN GYI BRAL BA'I LTOR GZUGS BSHAD PA'I THA GNYED KYI BTAG PA'I LTOR GZUGS BSHAD PA'I THA GNYED KYI BTAG PA'I LTOR means Shakespeare said, what did he say? A rose by any other name would smell the same. You can call a rose a pickle, but it will still smell like a rose.

It means everything can be experienced in a different way if you have a different seed.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (15:57 - 16:08)
Everything is empty of the thing you call it.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (16:08 - 17:20)
What's an example? Irritating person at lunch. You are eating lunch with some guy.

And everything they say is irritating. Then you think this person is truly irritating, but somebody in the world loves them. Somebody thinks they are great.

And we always try to convince them, no, no, you are wrong. You think they are a nice person, but they are really irritating. It means what you see is coming from your seed if you had a different seed.

You would see something different. So even the name you give them does not belong to them.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (17:21 - 17:22)
Even what?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (17:26 - 17:30)
The name you give to things does not belong to those things.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (17:35 - 17:37)
It belongs to you.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (17:39 - 18:00)
So don't get all excited about the new boyfriend that you met, because beautiful will be stupid after two weeks. And don't be too upset about irritating person.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (18:04 - 18:06)
Just relax.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (18:08 - 19:31)
So these are all methods of coping with problems. You have a way to cope with the problems. Okay, number five.

RANG NGON NAS SGRUB PA'I STONG BA [?] How does that go? LO NUS MED LA SNANG BA'I DBANG GI ZHAG BSAM PA YIN PA YUL RANG GI THUB MO MED PA'I DU LUS SU NGON NAS SGRUB PA'I STONG BA LO NUS MED LA SNANG BA'I DBANG GI ZHAG BSAM PA YIN PA YUL RANG GI THUB MO MED PA'I DU LUS KYI NGON NAS SGRUB PA'I STONG BA Okay, it means in system number five, when I see a pen, half of the pen is coming from that side, and half is coming from me. So for example, with the person at lunch, 50% is coming from them.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (19:34 - 19:40)
They look irritating, but 50% coming from me.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (19:43 - 19:54)
So in that system, half of the problem is coming from me, half of the problem is coming from them. I'm always making half of the problem.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (19:54 - 20:00)
In that system, half of the problem comes from them, the other half of the problem comes from me, but I'm always making half of the problem.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (20:01 - 20:06)
They look irritating, and I call them, I decide they are irritating.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (20:08 - 20:15)
But it cannot happen only from their own side.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (20:16 - 20:37)
Half the problem is always coming from me. So calm down. Just calm down.

Half of it is coming from you. That's number five. Everything is empty of coming 100% from its own side.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (20:44 - 20:46)
Now number six.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (20:47 - 20:53)
This is the correct one. The rest are not 100% correct.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (20:58 - 21:01)
What is the highest kind of emptiness?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (21:05 - 22:14)
100% of irritating person is coming from me. Because I was an irritating person last week, and it's always like that. I'll tell you a story, then maybe we stop.

I met some big lamas when I was very young. And I asked them, what's a good lama for me to study with? Where should I go to study?

Who is my root lama? Who is going to be my teacher? Then the lama said, Geshe Lobsang Tharchin.

You have to go stay with Geshe Lobsang Tharchin. Then I said, where is Geshe Lobsang Tharchin?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (22:18 - 22:23)
New Jersey. New Jersey.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (22:23 - 23:41)
At that time I was living in California. I was surfing every day. In Del Mar, most beautiful waves.

Then they said, you should live in New Jersey. In America, they have a name for New Jersey. They call it the armpit of the country.

Because it smells very bad there. They make gasoline there. Then you have to think, who made those things?

Where are those things coming from? Who made New Jersey? And I thought, oh, I hate New Jersey.

I don't want to go to New Jersey. So, in the sixth kind of emptiness, everything is empty of not coming from you.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (23:46 - 23:51)
It means everything is coming from you.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (23:51 - 24:22)
And everybody you meet is coming from you. It's a perfect mirror of your life. Good people.

Today we saw these beautiful flamenco dancers. Then when you see somebody like that, they are so graceful. They were so happy also.

You shouldn't thank them. You should thank yourself.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (24:26 - 24:29)
You did a good job.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (24:29 - 24:59)
Look at what you made this morning. Then you can feel happy. You can also thank them.

And then when you have a problem, and you meet an irritating person, you have to understand they are coming from you. So, in New Jersey, I came from a hot place, and I have to go to New Jersey.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (25:00 - 25:05)
Lama told me go to New Jersey. It's cold there.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (25:06 - 25:20)
And I saw first time snow. Then it snowed. Then I go to play in the snow.

Oh, look beautiful. Then I asked my friend, what time will it go away?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (25:23 - 25:29)
He said four months. What? It's too cold, you know.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (25:31 - 26:05)
Then I'm always cold in New Jersey. So sometimes I have to go to work every day. I have to wake up every morning.

I have to go to work I think about six o'clock. The bus to New York, it takes over two hours. The whole trip takes over two hours.

Every night I have to come back. So three, four hours I'm on the bus, you know.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (26:08 - 26:11)
Then I have to get up very early.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (26:11 - 26:12)
Like a robot.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (26:14 - 26:18)
Even I don't have to open my eyes.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (26:18 - 26:19)
Take a shower.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (26:20 - 26:24)
Eat breakfast. Walk to the bus.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (26:25 - 26:50)
Sit on the bus. Sleep. Then just before you reach New York, there's a tunnel, Lincoln Tunnel.

There's a curve to go into Lincoln Tunnel. Then you go like this. Then they wake you up.

Then put on the tie.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (26:52 - 26:53)
Like that.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (26:53 - 28:05)
So I did that for twenty years. Nineteen years. So on Saturday is recovery day.

You should sleep until like two o'clock. Sunday you have to wash your clothes. So you have half a day of life every week.

Sometimes Saturday I forget I don't have to wake up. Six o'clock. Go to the shower.

Then I go to put on my clothes. Then I say, oh today is Saturday. Then I just fall asleep.

Then I get up again. I go to the bathroom. There are four monks living in my house.

So I go to the bathroom. It's very cold in New Jersey.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (28:07 - 28:18)
To sit on the toilet is in the morning. First one in the morning. Then step in the bathroom.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (28:21 - 28:23)
Cold water everywhere.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (28:24 - 28:27)
On the floor. Then I go to the other monks.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (28:29 - 28:32)
They are having lunch. It's a Saturday. I wake up at lunchtime.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (28:32 - 28:55)
I say, I told you, you know, you are from Tibet, but at least you can learn to close the shower. You know, shower has a door. Close the door.

Take shower. Then come out.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (28:56 - 29:25)
One guy, first day he went in, he closed the door. He couldn't understand how to open the door again. He said, how to open this thing?

Then he doesn't like to close the door. So everywhere is water. He said, who's the kukpa?

kukpa means idiot. Who's the kukpa?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (29:28 - 29:30)
Who put the water on the floor?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (29:30 - 29:42)
I didn't take a shower. I didn't take a shower. I never take a shower.

Then I say, who took a shower?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (29:45 - 29:46)
You did.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (29:47 - 29:48)
No, today is Saturday.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (29:49 - 29:51)
You woke up early by accident.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (29:54 - 30:00)
You came out like that, you took shower. Halfway through the shower you decide not to take a shower.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (30:05 - 30:07)
You put the water on the floor.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (30:08 - 30:31)
That's okay. Right? We all to ourselves, we always say, that's okay.

Okay, it's no problem. If they did it, kukpa, kukpa. If I did it, that's okay.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (30:37 - 30:45)
So emptiness number six, all the cold water on the floor is coming from you.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (30:49 - 31:02)
All the irritating people in this retreat also are coming from you. Then relax. You won't yell at yourself.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (31:04 - 31:11)
Just clean it up. Just change the seeds.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (31:11 - 31:30)
You have power. Everything is your fault. Every irritating person is your fault.

But you also have power. You can get rid of all of them. You can remove all of them.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (31:32 - 31:38)
There were 800 people working in my company.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (31:38 - 31:43)
I cleaned out the company with my karma.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (31:44 - 31:57)
All the irritating people, you are going next week. Don't have to fire them. Just change your own seeds.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (31:58 - 32:16)
Then after a few years, 800 people, all happy. Every person. I feel like I'm in heaven at my job.

It's not difficult. I feel happy.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (32:16 - 32:30)
Every person is beautiful for 19 years. That's cool. Because it's empty, you can change everything.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (32:32 - 33:00)
You can live with cool people. That's why I keep working because it's happy. I feel happy to go there.

So that's the real emptiness. If you don't like irritating people, you have to stop being irritating to other people.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (33:02 - 33:11)
Then you fix everybody. And you never step in cold water.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (33:12 - 33:15)
Okay, those are the six kinds of emptiness.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (33:18 - 33:24)
Don't reject the first five.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (33:24 - 33:39)
Because sometimes your mind is not strong enough to hold number six. You have some boyfriend or girlfriend for many years.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (33:42 - 33:46)
Then one day you wake up and they say, see you later.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (33:48 - 34:03)
Why? I don't know. Bye.

Then you can't think about, oh, it's coming from me. It hurts too much. You feel too upset.

So you can go to number one.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (34:05 - 34:07)
Okay, try to relax.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (34:09 - 34:10)
Next year I'll have a new boyfriend.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (34:13 - 34:23)
Everything changes. And like that, when you're not strong enough for number six, you can go to number one.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (34:25 - 34:43)
Okay, I will wait for one month or two months. I will feel better after two months. I will eat a lot of ice cream.

Like that, okay? Everything changes. So you can use the lower emptiness until you can reach the higher one.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (34:50 - 34:52)
What's number two?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (34:52 - 34:55)
I can't control it.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (34:55 - 34:59)
That seed was planted a long time ago.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (34:59 - 35:00)
What, are you going to cry?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (35:01 - 35:09)
Shoot him? You can't control it. Relax.

It's over.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (35:10 - 35:28)
Something will come. Like that, you can go up the stairs. Up the six steps.

Each one helps you. But the first five are learning to cope with a problem.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (35:34 - 35:55)
Number six, the problem will never happen in the first place. First five, coping. Number six, nothing to cope about.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (35:55 - 36:09)
You never have a problem. So I hate... Lama told me not to say I hate.

I don't like. I really don't like.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (36:11 - 36:16)
A Buddhist teacher said, don't worry, everything is impermanent.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (36:19 - 36:51)
Maybe something good can come from this problem later. It's a learning process. My father got...

he liked to hunt. He taught me to hunt also. One day he went hunting in Utah.

He fell down on a big stone.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (36:53 - 36:55)
Hurt his rib.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (36:56 - 37:41)
Then he went to the hospital. It's a Mormon hospital. It's one kind of Christian.

Then they took x-ray. Then they said, Mr. Roach, it's a miracle. Then he said, why?

He said, it's such good luck you fell down. And father said, why? If you didn't fall down, we wouldn't take x-ray.

If you didn't fall down, we don't have to take x-ray. In the x-ray we found out you have very bad lung cancer.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (37:48 - 37:54)
Thank God you fell down. It's a blessing.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (37:56 - 37:57)
Then he said, how long I'm going to live?

[Geshe Michael Roach] (38:00 - 38:01)
Three months.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (38:03 - 38:49)
Then why did God give me cancer? It didn't make me fall down. I think it's better not to have cancer and not to fall down also.

It means better not to have a problem in the first place. Number six, you can change the problem before it happens. You don't have to try to be happy that your boyfriend broke up with you.

Just plant the karma to have a boyfriend who will not break up with you. And that's what emptiness is for.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (38:51 - 38:55)
Not to cope with a problem.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (38:55 - 39:04)
Not to try to find the happy thing about my cancer. Just make it not happen.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (39:06 - 39:07)
Before it happens.

[Geshe Michael Roach] (39:08 - 39:13)
That's number six. I like that one. Okay.